


be that girl you can't forget

by blueprincessbee



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt, F/F, F/M, Hurt No Comfort, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Post-Episode: s12e10 The Timeless Children, Stormcage Containment Facility, spacewives
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-18
Updated: 2020-06-18
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:47:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,760
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24794872
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blueprincessbee/pseuds/blueprincessbee
Summary: For the first time in all her years in Stormcage, River gets a neighbour. The prison thinks she's dangerous, but River isn't so sure.
Relationships: Eleventh Doctor/River Song, The Doctor/River Song, Thirteenth Doctor/River Song
Comments: 15
Kudos: 220





	be that girl you can't forget

**Author's Note:**

> title is from she by hayley kiyoko :)

The time between the Doctor’s visits always dragged.

River was pretty sure it was night time—it was hard to tell the time of day in Stormcage—but instead of sleeping she was lying on her bed, reading her diary, as she often did when she missed him.

She heard noises nearby and looked up. It wasn’t uncommon to hear distant shouts in the prison, but this shouting was coming from a lot closer, and was getting louder. She jumped off her bed, holding the diary close to her chest, with her thumb keeping the page, and peered out of the bars of her cell.

Coming down the corridor were three guards, two of them dragging someone between them, with the other bringing up the rear, gun trained on the back of the figure. The person they were dragging was hunched over and seemed to just barely be walking. All three guards were shouting at them to hurry up. Their blonde hair was completely covering their face and their yellow braces were hanging from their blue trousers.

River watched as they pushed the person into the cell next to hers. This was new: she had never had anyone nearby her before. Her first thought was that this end of the prison was reserved for the most dangerous prisoners, so whatever this person had done, it was bad, and her next thought was that it was going to be impossible to keep her little excursions in the TARDIS a secret from her new neighbour. The guards locked the cell and left, laughing loudly with each other.

River waited until she could no longer hear them, and then waited a bit more, before opening her own cell door—it had never been able to contain her—and slipping into the neighbouring cell, locking it behind her (she didn’t think the Doctor would like it if she accidentally let a dangerous prisoner escape, even if she didn’t look in any state to do so).

Her new neighbour was curled into a ball on the floor, her hair fanned out around her head. River crouched down next to her. She had no visible injuries other than rope burns on her wrists. She hadn’t reacted to River entering and her eyes were scrunched shut.

“Are you alright?” River whispered. She had no idea what had been done to the woman, having never been on the receiving end of the guards’ brutality herself (she had willingly allowed herself to be locked up, and honestly, she suspected the guards were scared of her, given how easily she could escape). The woman’s eyes opened at the question and she stared at River, looking like she had seen a ghost, but otherwise didn’t move at all.

River went to gently touch the woman’s wrist, but she moved suddenly, pushing herself up and against the wall, away from River.

“You’re not really here,” she said weakly. “But…” She trailed off and leant her head back against the wall, her hands going to clutch her side as she let out a groan of pain.

River stayed crouched where she was, not wanting to spook the woman any more, but even from a distance she could see a tear tracking its way down her cheek. “I’m River,” she said. “I just want to help you.”

The woman stared at River, her breathing becoming ragged as more tears slid down her face. She made no move to wipe them away. When she spoke, her voice was strained. “I really don’t need this right now. Leave me alone.” River stood up but didn’t move, unsure of whether she should actually leave her to her pain or not. “Go away!” the woman shouted, but her voice broke and the shout became a sob.

River backed away quickly and returned to her own cell. She lay back down on her bed and listened to the woman’s restrained sobs until she fell into an uneasy sleep.

-

The next day, River listened out for any signs of life from the neighbouring cell, but it was well into the afternoon before she heard anything.

“River.” The voice came from the cell next door. It sounded like the woman was stood in the corner closest to the bars and to River’s cell.

“Yes,” she said, rushing to the equivalent corner of her own cell. “I’m here.”

“Are you really there?” River thought she sounded a lot stronger than she had the previous night.

“Yes, I’m really here.”

“So this is Stormcage? 52nd century?”

“How could you not know where you are?” River paused for a second, thinking. “Did you time travel to get here or something?”

“Must’ve done.”

A momentary silence fell between them. There was something so achingly familiar about this woman, even though River was certain she had never seen her before.

“What’s your name?” River asked her.

“John,” the woman said, a little too quickly. “John Smith.”

River chuckled. “Nice to meet you, John. I know someone else who goes by that name sometimes.”

“It’s a common name.” She sounded almost as if she was defending herself. River doubted it was her real name.

Hearing footsteps coming down the hallway, River quickly moved away from the bars and sat on her bed. Three guards, possibly the same ones that had deposited John in her cell the previous day, came into view. River watched as two of them went into John’s cell and the other stood guard outside, gun in hand. She could hear John talking, although she couldn’t make out what she was saying, until her voice went quiet abruptly.

“She doesn’t look dangerous, does she?” One of the guards in the cell said, speaking louder so the one outside the cell, and by extension, River, could hear. “What did she do to land in here?”

“Her whole file’s redacted,” the guard outside said, “but I heard it was something to do with the Time Lords.” If they didn’t already have River’s full attention, they certainly had it now.

“She must be crazy to get on the wrong side of them,” the other guard in the cell said.

“And dangerous. They must’ve had a really good reason for sending her here. The Time Lords usually handle things themselves, don’t they?”

They left the cell and walked away, already moving on from discussing John.

River waited until she was sure they were long gone before slipping into John’s cell again. She was lying unconscious on the floor. River put two fingers to her wrist and, just as she had expected from the guards’ conversation, she felt the characteristic double pulse of a Time Lord.

She was about to inspect John to figure out what they had done to her, when she groaned and her eyes fluttered open.

“River,” she said softly, almost breathing the word out. She said it with a kind of reverence that tugged on the edges of River’s memory, as if she’d heard her name spoken that way a thousand times before.

“What did they do to you?”

John lifted an arm up with incredible difficulty and mimed injecting something into her other arm.

“They drugged you?” River asked, and as if in response, John let her arm fall heavily back onto the floor, letting out another weak groan.

“Why would they drug you?”

John seemed to be struggling to speak, as if moving her mouth required energy that she didn’t have. “…Dangerous.”

River couldn’t imagine how the woman in front of her was so dangerous that the prison felt she needed to be drugged. She just looked like an ordinary person, not exactly a hardened criminal or a remorseless psychopath.

“You have two hearts,” River said. “Are you a Time Lord?” John’s face scrunched up in thought. “Let me help you to your bed.” While John was thinking, River supported her to her feet and led her to the uncomfortable bed in the corner.

“Don’t know,” John said eventually, lying down and scrunching her eyes shut. “Head fuzzy.”

River watched her, trying to place what was so familiar about her.

“I’m going back to my cell,” she said. “Shout if you need me.” She headed into the corridor. “Well, maybe best not to shout. We don’t want to attract any special attention from the guards now, do we?”

John didn’t react, just lay there, her breath coming heavy, but River knew there was nothing else she could do, so she slipped back into her own cell.

For the rest of the day, River tried to focus on reading one of her archaeology books, but her mind kept drifting to John. What had she done to earn her prison time? And what did it have to do with the Time Lords? She would have to ask the Doctor when she next saw him.

That night, River could hear crying coming from John’s cell.

-

“River?” John’s voice drifted over from the corner of her cell the next day. “Are you still there?”

River moved to stand in the corner. “Of course I’m still here. We are in a prison, dear.” She noted the irony of her words, given that, for a prisoner, she spent an awful lot of time outside of her cell.

“I… I’m not a Time Lord,” John said, speaking slowly, presumably due to the drugs still in her system. “I don’t think.”

“You don’t think?”

“They did something to me.” She paused, and for a moment River thought she wasn’t going to elaborate. “They… took my memories. I don’t even know what I’m in here for.”

River couldn’t imagine not knowing why she was imprisoned. Even though she was locked up for something she didn’t do, at least she always had the knowledge of her innocence to hang on to—to keep her sane. She realised how someone could easily be framing John for something, and she wouldn’t know either way. Or, she thought with a horrible feeling of dread settling in her stomach, John could really be as dangerous as the guards obviously thought she was, and the Time Lords had wiped her crimes from her memory to prevent her from recommitting. She had a hard time believing the latter, given how small and fragile John seemed, but it would be stupid of her to not entertain the possibility.

“I don’t think the prison even knows,” River said. “I heard the guards saying your whole file was redacted.”

“Hm,” John hummed in response.

That evening, when the TARDIS materialised in the corridor and River left her cell as easily as if she were just leaving the house for a date, she glanced into John’s cell. She was huddled in the far corner, knees to her chest, her eyes fixed on the TARDIS. But River could see no confusion on her face, only a hint of sadness, longing maybe. Of course, River thought, she was familiar with Time Lords so she must realise what it was. Although that didn’t explain why she didn’t seem bothered by the fact that it was obviously there to pick River up.

She realised she was staring and looked away.

“Hello, sweetie,” she said as she entered the TARDIS.

The Doctor grinned at her from the console, before setting to work piloting the ship.

“Zesutune,” he said, flicking switches dramatically. “Planet known for its ridiculous parties.” River bit back the urge to correct his horrible flying. If she wanted him to hack into Stormcage’s database, she was better off not insulting him. He paused with his hand on the lever and looked at her. “Are you ready party, River?”

“Always,” she said, and he pulled the lever down, sending the TARDIS into flight.

He bounded towards her and she pulled him into a kiss. Kissing the Doctor always felt like coming home, but she couldn’t get John out of her mind.

“I’m going to get changed,” she said, “but first I need to ask you a favour.”

“Oh, yeah? What favour?”

“I got a new neighbour the other day,” she explained. “A woman in the cell next to mine. Called herself John Smith.” The Doctor raised an eyebrow at the name. “Apparently she’s so dangerous that the prison is keeping her drugged, but she doesn’t even know what she’s in for.”

“Or that’s what she tells you.”

“It’s something to do with the Time Lords.”

“The Time Lords?” the Doctor said slowly, and River could see the pain of his lost home flashing in his eyes. “Is she a Time Lord?”

“She’s got two hearts but she said she isn’t. She said they took her memories.”

The Doctor frowned and sat down in one of the chairs, staring intently at the floor in thought. River just watched him, knowing better than to interrupt him when he was like this. After a few moments, he looked back at her. “So you want me to have a look in the database? See what I can find?”

“If that’s not too much of a bother,” she said. “You might have to dig pretty deep, though. The guards said her whole file’s redacted.”

He stood up, straightened his bow tie, and walked over to the screen. “I’m sure I can find my way around it. You go get changed, we still have a party to get to.”

He began typing and she left to get changed.

She returned to the console room in a deep green dress that just reached her knees.

“Find anything?” she asked the Doctor, who was stood looking at the screen.

“No,” he said, sounding confused. River knew he hated being confused. “I can’t find the original data anywhere.” She made her way over to the screen as the Doctor read out what he had found. Or rather, what he hadn’t found. “No name, no species, no record of her charges. The only information is her sentence: life.”

“That’s a bit odd, don’t you think?”

“Oh, absolutely,” he said. “But, River…” He looked her in the eyes, face suddenly completely serious. “Be careful. Whoever she is, chances are she is very dangerous. You don’t want to push too hard and accidentally reveal who she was before her memory was wiped.”

River rolled her eyes. He was always telling her to be careful. “Okay, sweetie.” She had absolutely no intention of listening to him.

He put his arm around her waist. “Party?”

“Party,” she agreed.

River stayed the night on the TARDIS and the Doctor returned her to Stormcage only a few hours after she had left. He decided to land the TARDIS out of view of John’s cell, even though River knew she had already seen it, and walk her back. John was in the same position as when they left, and she watched them approach. River noticed the Doctor inspecting her, and she could practically see his brain working.

Back in her cell, the Doctor kissed her goodnight and left. She immediately went to the corner by John’s cell.

“Are you okay?” she asked, and waited. No reply came. “John?”

“Leave me alone,” John said, her voice sounding faint and tired.

River sighed and lay down on her bed. She would usually be buzzing with happiness after she’d seen the Doctor but she couldn’t stop thinking about John. She couldn’t explain why she felt so drawn to the mysterious woman and that bothered her.

-

It was a while before River spoke to John again. This time, when the guards came to drug her, River didn’t visit her cell. She waited a few days until she thought the effects of the drugs must have mostly worn off before escaping her cell and looking into John’s from the corridor.

John was pacing. She looked very much like a caged animal, and River was taken aback by how different she seemed. She had previously thought John looked small and unassuming, and couldn’t understand how she could be dangerous, but seeing her stood up for the first time, free from the effects of the drugs, she could see exactly why the prison was so afraid of her.

She was slightly shorter than River, but her presence was huge. River still didn’t get a criminal vibe from her—she knew a criminal when she saw one—but she definitely felt like this was someone you didn’t want to cross.

“John,” River said, and she stopped pacing and looked at her. River was expecting her gaze to be intimidating (not that she would’ve actually been intimidated), but instead, the look John gave her felt soft and almost caring, but River could see nothing but pain in her eyes. “I’m curious,” she said, trying to shake the thought that this was disturbingly similar to how the Doctor looked at her. “Do you mind if I ask you something?”

“What?”

“You said the Time Lords took your memories,” River said, speaking slowly and carefully. She didn’t want to say the wrong thing and lose her chance of finding anything out. “So, what exactly _do_ you remember?”

John walked over to the bars and considered River for a moment. “I remember my whole life. Or, I thought I did. I only discovered that I had memories missing recently.” She gave a hollow laugh and averted her eyes. “And then I was arrested.”

River thought for a moment, and silence stretched between them. John appeared to be avoiding looking at her.

“You didn’t seem to be bothered by my husband breaking me out,” River said.

John shrugged. “You came back, didn’t you?” River didn’t point out that there was no way John could have known that she was coming back. “It’s none of my business.” John let out another humourless laugh. “Well…” River thought she was about to say something to contest it not being her business. “Never mind.” She turned away from River and sat down heavily on her bed. River understood that the conversation was over.

-

A couple of weeks passed, and River carried on trying to talk to John but she never got anything more out of her. She tried asking about her life—the life that she did remember—but John never gave anything away. Despite this, River became more and more drawn to the enigmatic woman.

When the Doctor next visited, he informed her that he had made some kind of breakthrough in the database.

“I kept digging,” he said as she boarded the TARDIS. “And I found something.”

“I knew you wouldn’t be able to resist,” River said. “Especially not when it has to do with the Time Lords. What did you find?”

“Reference for the time zone she was teleported from. It was very heavily encrypted but according to her file she came from the very far future.”

“But, how? If it’s Time Lords that sent her here then surely—“

“I know.”

They both fell silent. The Doctor was staring at the screen as if willing it to give him more answers, but of course it did not yield.

-

A few weeks later, River had figured out that in order to talk to John without being shut out, she had to not ask any questions. She had begun to share books with John, who, despite claiming to have read them all already, accepted them gladly.

That was how River found herself in John’s cell, both of them sat on the cramped bed. She had handed over one of her books that detailed the history of the Luna University and was now talking about her time there as a student.

When she finished speaking, she noticed John staring at her with that familiar pain hidden deep in her eyes. River felt an unexplainable pull between them and reached up to push a piece of John’s hair out of her face. John watched her hand carefully, looking conflicted, as if she couldn’t decide whether to let River touch her hair or not, but ultimately she didn’t move. River brought her hand down to rest over John’s on the bed.

She felt the connection between them bubbling to the surface. The answer to who John really was. It was right there, in the depths of her mind, on the tip of her tongue. She was about to figure it out.

A gun fired close by, followed by lots of shouting and more gunshots, prematurely interrupting River’s realisation. She whipped her head around at the noises and got up from the bed, running over to the bars and looking out. John stayed where she was on the bed, rooted to the spot.

She had barely got there when a man came running into view. He was handsome and his greatcoat flapped behind him as he ran. He was carrying a gun and had a long, grey coat draped over his arm, and was looking into each cell as he passed. He looked confused for a moment at River’s empty cell before he reached John’s cell and peered inside.

“Jack?” John said, standing up, genuine surprise showing on her face.

“Doctor?” Jack said with an American accent.

River stared at “John”. Doctor. _Doctor._ Of course. She should’ve guessed it just from the name ‘John Smith’.

“Doctor,” she said. It wasn’t a question—more of an accusation.

“River,” the Doctor said softly, at least having the decency to look guilty. “I’m sorry.”

“What did you do?” River asked, before remembering that she didn’t know. She suddenly had so many more questions. “And what did you mean that you aren’t a Time Lord?”

The Doctor shook her head sadly. “Spoilers.”

River stepped towards her and took both of the Doctor’s hands in hers. “Why didn’t you just tell me it was you?”

The Doctor squeezed her hands. “I haven’t seen you in hundreds of years. I thought it would hurt too much.” She untangled her hands from River’s. “You can’t remember this.”

“No,” River breathed. She couldn’t just take her memories.

“Hate to cut this short, ladies,” Jack said, opening the cell door, “but we really need to get going, Doctor. We’re going to have company soon.”

“River, I’m sorry. It’s the only way.” She took River’s hand and led her back into her own cell. River let herself be taken. She felt numb. She wanted to fight back, to demand to keep her memories, but found she couldn’t. The Doctor put her fingers to River’s temples. “I know I never told you this enough, so—“ she gulped “—I love you, River Song.”

For one glorious moment, River felt sure of the one thing she had always doubted. The Doctor loved her. And then everything went blank.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading!! i got the idea for this fic after i read 'the very last inch of us' by hellynz so go read that it's amazing!!


End file.
